Kind of random content. Maybe the occasional fic here and there. Mostly memes, funny stuff, or stuff I just wanna save for later. No organization here.
Other blogs:
Autonomousroboticorganismsexual.
Kacchanstopscreaming.
Thegodofmischiefandperfection.
Loveforfictionalmen.
Iamturtlelover.
Remember how we were little and we loved pink and Barbie and dolls and princesses?
Remember how we got old enough to realize that people were making fun of us and not enough people told us to ignore them so we got embarrassed and we hated ourselves. Pink was our least favorite color until perhaps recently when we were neutral towards it at best.
But something in us changed when we decided we needed to see Barbie (2023). The women and girls I saw wearing their best pinks today. I purposely bought MYSELF something pink for the first time I can remember.
One thing that tickled me about the Barbie movie was how Gloria’s husband is (imo) a ‘Real World’ Ken.
We see very little of him in the movie. In both of his scenes, he’s trying to speak/learn Spanish. He does nothing important or if consequence in terms of the plot… But he’s trying to learn a language his wife and daughter speak. He’s not excelling, I’m not even sure if he’s succeeding. But he is kensistently trying.
For all of the 'Real World’ men who are antagonists or opponents to Barbie, El Esposo de Gloria (as he is listed in the credits) has true Kenergy.
Being a son of Sparda doesn’t mean he doesn’t have time to fool around with you ! Gender neutral human reader
Teenage Years | DMC3
Being the massive flirt he is he’ll most likely try and flirt with you upon meeting
Seeing as his twin brother is currently trying to kill him and take his necklace he’ll keep your first conversation short and leave you with his number
After literal Hell on Earth he’ll remember to give you a call
Y’all click instantly…he’s also just a really easy person to get along with but we’ll just ignore that
Now we all know he STAYS broke so either you pay for a meal or y’all are taking a walk in the park somewhere
Getting him to actually talk about himself is pretty difficult
Give him space and he’ll open up about deeper things in his life eventually especially things that concern his demon half(brother, childhood, etc.)
He does enjoy throwing compliments everywhere so expect daily words of praise whether it be sarcastic, goofy, exaggerated, or sincere praise
If you like to compliment as well it’ll be like the most sickening bromance ever
If your still in school DO NOT go to him for homework help
He’ll hype you up for sure but if you need genuine academic help just get a tutor💀
Would be genuinely upset if you made a joke regarding his white hair bro would get hella moody and claim you aren’t friends anymore
If you have a part time job you can BET he’s gonna ask for some bread
Not exactly outright but he’ll allude to it like..
“You remember all the damage those demon guys did to my shop? Yeah…it’s gonna cost A TON to repair it by myself…”
“Are you hungry? Well I heard about this new pizza spot that WE should totally tryout 😁.”
If you like to make clothes/jewelry/accessories he’ll totally wear it
Refuses to let you mess with his hair until like two years into knowing each other
Takes pride in his looks and you should too! Self care! Ofc you’re paying for any and all expenses🫶
Glorified sugar daddy😭
If you live with your parents…so does he
Congratulations you have a new brother 🩰
If you don’t he’ll offer to be roommates so he can get a cheaper rent
You’ll definitely meet Lady she is absolutely appalled at how you tolerate him constantly sarcastically ofc she knows he’s a good guy
If you’re into video games he’ll play with you granted he doesn’t have the money to pay for a game console so it’ll be on whatever console you have
Once he’s in your life he’s never leaving literally.
A best-friend for a lifetime
Adult Years
He probably saved you from some demons
Like if you met him in his teenage year he’d def start flirting
What can I say he stays true to himself
His personality would never change regardless of his aging
Still the same wacky woohoo pizza man we know and love
Thinks you look hot and invites you on a date which quickly just turns into a hangout after the LACK of romance
Still finds hanging with you to be fun and keeps a friendship
Even after establishing a friendship he still flirts here and there—force of habit
Would definitely teach you how to ride a motorcycle if you didn’t already know
More willing to let you mess with his hair
Like put it in pigtails or tie it up/braid it
Introduced you to the whole DMC gang
Now depending on the time period he’ll tell you about Vergil and his upbringing
He would totally tell you all about it after the events of DMC5 after he returns ofc!
I feel like he’s an animal guy so if you have any pets they’re now his pets too
Co-parenting core🩰
If you’re an artist he’ll be your muse/reference material any day
Loves the attention
Drunk dance nights
Karaoke too he doesn’t have the best singing voice but it’s not the worst
Since he’s a devil hunter he goes on missions a lot and seeing as you don’t want to get your shit rocked you stay behind
Cherishes every moment spent together and will make sure you know that
You always take him with you on vacations
How could you not???
He appreciates if you chip in helping him pay off his MASSIVE FUCKING DEBT
He doesn’t expect you to though
Despite being broke he stays stylish and if you asked would help you with fashion
Ofc he isn’t like BIG on fashion but cmon have you seen his looks? He dabbles
Immediately sees you after missions and starts ranting about the entire thing
“Can you believe it?! So obviously I shot that nasty bitch and it had the nerve to explode all over my jacket! It died so I can’t even get it to pay for a new one!”
“Don’t worry about why I smell like this worry about the fact that Trish totally took MY commission!”
Very dramatic but laid back too if that makes sense
Calls you cheesy nicknames that I will not elaborate on use your imagination 🗣️🫶
Enjoys live music and will go with you to concerts if you like
Shows you his demon form if you’re interested
Whatever your hobby is he’ll be interested
Would make sure nothing ever bad happened to you regarding devils ofc
A small, non-comprehensive list of things that stood out to me (spoilers? Kind of?)
The soundtrack
All the jokes that played off of what it was actually like to play with barbies (the pool & ocean being flat, the cups having no drinks in them, the shower having no water, etc.
TRANS BARBIE
The choreography
The “I Am Kenough” tie-dye sweater
Barbies of many shapes and sizes! All very beautiful!
THE ENDING, OH MA LORD. Both the way the story concluded really beautifully, but also the ending joke that no one was prepared for—
Just… everything about Ryan Gosling’s performance
Kate McKinnon playing the deranged, “ugly” Barbie
In the same vein, that movie would NOT have been complete without representing the kids who played with their dolls “too hard” (cutting their hair, bending them in weird ways, etc.)
Acknowledging that Barbie did in fact mean a lot to some girls. This movie was geared towards everyone, whether you grew up loving Barbie or hating her.
The mom and her daughter
The fact that when Barbie was starting to become “defective” and/or when she was in the real world, you could start to see her “"flaws”“. Like I noticed in some scenes her eyebrows were unplucked and no longer perfectly sculpted, or her skin no longer perfectly smooth with foundation.
It was clear that SO much thought and research was put into this. I couldn’t believe how many references there were to specific clothing items, certain playsets, etc.
The fact that Barbie and Ken DIDN’T end up together, and that Barbie DIDN’T indulge Ken in his flirtations (is that a word?) even once
THE FACT THAT I WAS SO CLOSE TO ACTUAL TEARS LIKE SEVEN TIMES???? LIKE WHAT????
The weird dark humor coming out of nowhere
The fact that Barbie never once looked at the human women (who were "imperfect” in comparison to her) with disgust
……the moment between her and the woman on the bench 😭😭😭
The mom’s rant about how hard it is being a woman (esp a mother) and how you can never win 🙌🙏
The misogyny in the Real World was so well done. It wasn’t overexaggated or over the top it was just NORMAL EVERYDAY LIFE
THE JOKE ABOUT HAVING A MAN SIT YOU DOWN TO TALK ABOUT THE GODFATHER ASDJGKDLW
The moment where I went “OH so THAT’S where the mugshot memes came from”
Ruth Handler <3
The fact that everyone came to the theater dressed either in pink or Barbie-like attire :)
You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow, we’re always doing it wrong?
You have to be thin, but not too thin, and you can never say you wanna be thin. You have to say you wanna be healthy, but also, you have to BE THIN.
You have to have money, but you can’t ask for money because that’s crass.
You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean.
You have to lead, but you can’t squash other people’s ideas.
You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t talk about your kids all the damn time.
You have to be a career woman, but also, always be looking out for other people.
You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is INSANE, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining!
You’re supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood, but ALWAYS STAND OUT and ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL. But never forget that the system is rigged, so find a way to acknowledge that but ALSO, always be grateful!
You have to never get old. Never be rude. Never show off. Never be selfish. Never fall down. Never fail. Never show fear. Never get OUT OF LINE. It’s too hard! It’s too contradictory, and nobody gives you a medal or says ‘thank you!’ And it turns out, in fact, that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also, everything is your fault.
I’m just so tired of watching myself, and every single other woman tie herself into knots, so that people will like us.
And if all of that, is also true for a doll just representing a woman, then I don’t even know.“ -Gloria the barbie movie
This is basically what my physical therapist had me do for my back problems last year and it helped with the pain so much! Also walk for at least thirty minutes a day, even if it’s just in small chunks throughout the day.
ALT
